People are rude. So, so rude. I wonder how this has happened. Were people always rude or is this something new and modern? Or is it that my tolerance levels have just plummeted with me getting older?
I am not naive. I realise that people don’t necessarily treat you like you treat them. I will be honest, I have a pretty hard time accepting this because deep down I am still under the illusion that people are all well meaning when I know with proof that they are not. But for some reason I still get so surprised when I meet a rude person.
I am a nurse. I am used to people being rude to me. They shout at me, threaten me, call me names and sometimes even make sexual jokes. But I cannot truthfully say its water off a duck’s back. It simply jars less with the passage of time. But it is still irritating and makes me ask ‘Why? Why all the aggro? How is this necessary? Or beneficial?’
I am going to highlight ways in which people are rude to others everyday because I am sure we all come across these behaviours every day and they have become so mundane that we do not even realise how disrespectful they truly are. Oh, and for the record, being rude is not only about actively doing something deplorable, but also the absence of politeness.

Shut-up:

Seriously. If you cannot say something nice, just shut up. Say nothing. You are under no obligation to comment about everything. Your opinion is actually not that important, especially if it is going to hurt someone without helping them. Express your opinion by all means, but if you are at a dinner party and do not like the food, just shut up. Leave it there or eat it anyway, but someone would have gone through a lot of trouble and effort to make you something so just lump it. I am sure they would not have made the food bad on purpose. If you really must comment or if asked, try to offer ideas on how the meal could have been improved rather than just shooting it down and acknowledge the effort made. Or if you meet someone who has suddenly gained a lot of weight or has had an unfortunate haircut, just shut-up. Chances are, they have a mirror at home and they know and they feel like shit. It is incredibly impolite. If they bring it up just say ‘don’t worry, hair grows/you went through a hard time things will get better’ etc…words of encouragement. I have acne, even though I am 32. Sometimes it is painful and often ugly and unsightly. But coming up to me and telling me ‘you have a pimple on your face’ is just plain rude. And a little stupid. I mean, I can feel it every time I talk or yawn or eat or do anything that stretches out the skin on my face. I know I have a pimple on my face. It’s a mix of cystic acne and acne rosacea. I’ve known since I was 12.

Restraint, people.

Personal Space:

When talking to people, unless you know them really well, there is no need to touch them. Seriously. I knew a guy who used to poke me on the shoulder every time he made a point. He also would be right up close to my face. I knew he had a cavity in his left molar. I also knew he drank hot chocolate with orange for breakfast. Too damn close. And poking. It would be all I could do not to rip off his arm and beat him with it.

Inaction:

I see an old lady in the road with a bag of shopping. All of a sudden, the bottom of the bag disintegrates and the groceries go everywhere. For God’s sake, help the old lady pick them up! Ask a nearby shop for a new bag! Do something other than just dodge the old lady and her purchases. When I stopped to help, the old lady was so flabbergasted that someone actually helped her that she gave me a suspicious look.

One time at hospital my arms were full of equipment and I could not negotiate the door. I tried to open with my elbow in a waiting room brimming with people. Someone finally approached me and instead of helping, asked if I could check his blood pressure. When I said yes, he then held the door for me.
Nothing is for nothing in this world.

Tone:

Why bark at someone when you can speak to that person nicely? Especially on the phone. I hate it when people are rude to me on the phone because it is so cowardly. You cannot see my face or my surroundings and therefore you do not care or take it into account which you believe is the perfect excuse to be incredibly rude or violent with your words.

Generally, I react by being extremely kind and sweet. Eventually the other person will calm down and sometimes even feel some remorse.
 I guess one can say that rudeness generally boils down to selfishness. When one completely disregards what another person feels what generally results is rudeness. It is also a lack of education. I do not mean academia. Education comes in many forms and one of the most important lessons to be learned is how to deal with others and how it may not be the best course of action to constantly put yourself first.

In other words:
Don’t be an arse-face.
It’s a choice.

  

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