In the early hours of the morning today we had our first thunderstorm, officially declaring loud and clear that summer is over.

For as long as I can remember, on the first sign of a storm, I took it as the time to reflect on what that year’s summer meant to me. Now I am not a summer person, I absolutely love winter. But summer for some reason always brings about something to learn from. I can’t really understand why…while I was still at school it was understandable due to all the free time and my friends having the same amount of free time and we were always thinking up fun things to do.

But as an adult, there are no such thing as summer holidays and work does not stop and at hospital, we don’t get half days. I guess it must be the general feeling of summer and the heat that makes things slow down a bit and allows other things to happen, or else since there isn’t so much going on it allows us to see them better and think about them more.

I started out this summer determined to have a great time every single day. I wanted this to be the summer of fun. All that mattered was my own enjoyment and absolutely nothing else. This will be the summer of fabulousness.

And for the most part it was. Going swimming, going out for wine and jazz, making new friends…it was wonderful.

And it was also very selfish and self-absorbed. There just didn’t seem to be space for anyone else.

I didn’t care about work, I didn’t care about family and worst of all, I didn’t care about my marriage.

My husband isn’t the type of guy to make a fuss if I go out with my friends or partake in activities that do not involve him. He knows that we have very, very different interests. So I just ran with it. What I started to forget was that we also have a lot in common. 

I focussed more and more on what we did not have rather than on what we do have. 

I don’t know what got into me. But I am glad I realised before it was too late. We have a bond. A strong one. 

Sometimes it takes a crisis to make you wake up and to show you that maybe you have been dealing with things badly. There is a line in the title song of Disney’s Beauty and the Beast that goes ‘bitter-sweet and strange, finding you can change, learning you were wrong.’

So what did this summer teach me? To never take anything for granted. Especially those you love and who love you in return.

I am looking forward to a winter full of love. 

  

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