Yvonne is my younger sister and she is such a character that she deserves a post all to herself.

She is four years younger but taller than me and even though I don’t see it, people mistake her for my twin. People stop her in the street and say ‘Marie! How are you?’ And vice versa. She is a social worker, which gives us a huge connection because we both know how to deal with pain and suffering for little pay and even less thanks.

Yvonne has to be the funniest person I know. She is hilarious and that is precisely because she never actively tries to be. She is very assertive and I quote ‘won’t take shit from anyone’ and she really doesn’t.

Some wonderful Yvonne moments:

1. She managed, without my mum noticing, to harbour an enormous and expensive doll into school. At the end of the day, I opened her school bag to get a marker and found the doll. I just turned to her and said ‘Yvonne! What the….’ and she gave me a look with intent, put her finger to her lips and said ‘shhhhhh!’

2. She ran into the house in a panic ‘Marie! The neighbour’s dog is woofing at me!’

3. She gave me a Miss Piggy toy for Christmas. Before I unwrapped it she said ‘I hope this won’t offend you…’

4. I had gone to the dentist with my mum. My sister called my mum not knowing we were still together and my mum said ‘wow, Marie has great teeth thank God!’ to which Yvonne replied ‘yes, thank God since she has such horrible skin poor thing.’

5. She told her driving instructor to remove his feet from the dashboard because they are unsightly and she is paying him.

6. Yvonne is posh. Marie is not. (This is an in-joke that only she and I truly understand.)

Yes, my sister is the stuff. I love her dearly. I have fun with her, I love talking to her and I love laughing with her. I am protective of her and if anyone says anything against her I would react violently.

20131205-192458.jpg

This is a pic of my sis and I on my wedding day. My veil blew off in the wind and she caught it for me in this strangely acrobatic twisty jumping move.

I can’t understand sisters who hate each other. It’s madness. To me, a sister is a person who was born into friendship. And she will always be my friend. And she takes a lot of my shit. But shit between sisters is fragrant.

And of course, now this post has turned weird. And slightly disgusting.

20131205-193246.jpg

Truly one in a million.

Advertisements